Captain Blurp's rambles

I have consented to write about a person who is by far the sweetest and most frustrating individual you'll ever meet - and did I mention weird? You can talk to him and he'll turn to you with a "huh?" (Did I mention frustrating?) You'll have staring contests where you have no idea what it's even about (then you go out for ice cream)! His new idol is Scarface and his dream career is loan shark (tsk tsk). But even so, because of him I have started a blog. He has also saved my (stupid) computer's life and now it's like a shiny new toy! And all the while he's halfway across the globe! (so about a quarter of you are safe from him) Who is this (rare) individual? My incredibly smart cousin who - wants to meet; will meet; has met - Al Pacino. You lucky S.O.B.

My introductory nonsense is EPIC. End of Story._.